A Fight Club Tattoo

I happened to stumble across this insane Fight Club tattoo.


Click the image for full size. Original Link to Picture

Me, a Crazy Man, and My Car

I was driving a few days ago and stopped at a stoplight. A homeless looking guy comes up to my driver’s window. I, in my infinite wisdom, decide to see if I can make eye contact. I look him straight in the eye and shake my head—like I’m not going to give him anything.

He starts freaking out. He starts pounding on my window. At which point I think, woah, maybe that wasn’t a great idea. But for some reason I didn’t fee intimidated.

I look back at him, straight in the eye, and he walks away. I’m still wondering why I wasn’t afraid. Two years ago, I would have been an emotional wreck, but now I really don’t feel any different.

Testing Testing One Two Three

So I went and got tested the other day. No I don’t actually think I have anything or have any reasons to believe I do, I just went because my friend was going and she needed someone to go with her. I wanted to go because I would normally be afraid to do it. I looked at it as a “face your fears” kind of challenge.

Since I was going to be there, I figured I mind as well go through the whole gauntlet and give myself a clean bill of health—still crossing my fingers.

We walk in and we each grab a ticket. Mine was 53. Three other people were waiting—they all look seriously distressed. I can’t imagine waiting there worrying and praying about getting AIDS. Meanwhile, I, on the other hand, ran off some statistics and estimated that only about 3 heterosexual circumcised non-drug user Asian males in Hawaii (people like me) get HIV/AIDS ever year. Three. Yes, this number involved a lot of guessing, so don’t quote me on it, but I assure you, the number is very small. Put simply, I wasn’t worried.

What I did worry about was the “inspection.” Needles don’t bother me so much; it was the old lady nurse who’d be visually inspecting “my goods.”

I walk in and they ask for my ID, all kinds of information—including where I work and my address. They ask why I’m there and I tell them my friend wanted to come and she wanted someone to go with her. (This was the honest truth, but I felt like they didn’t believe me. I didn’t care)

Next, I go in the back and a nurse asks me all about my sex life. How many partners have you had in the past 3 months, 6 months, 12 months? Do you use a condom every time? Has your current partner been tested?

If there is ever a time when I felt someone was judging me, this was it. This was my biggest test for indifference, ever.

She finally gave me the spiel, “only when you are in a committed one on one relationship and you completely trust that other person and you have both been test, can you stop using condoms.”

“Yes mam.”

At that point pulling down my pants wasn’t really an issue. I thought I was a degenerate in her eyes for having oral sex without a condom, so showing my private parts wasn’t much of anything.

So down my pants went—undies an all. She pushed up against my area to check for anything and I got the all clear. Then, she asked me spread open up my urethra (the part piss and jizz come out) and then she pushed a q-tip up it. Yes, it WAS that much fun.

She thanked me and offered me condoms—they were the Durex intense sensation ones, which are ok. I saw some Durex super thin non-latex Avanti’s in the corner and asked for those. From what I’ve heard, they’re quite good, but I’m too much of a cheap ass to spend more than $2 per condom. She said she couldn’t give them to me since I wasn’t allergic to latex. Oh well, at least I tried.

Next, I went to the AIDS conversation guy. “number 53” he called. He then questioned my knowledge of AIDS. I told him all the stuff I learned in school and he was generally positive. I did learn that AIDS can be transmitted through breast milk. Interesting.

He also asked me how many people I had sex with in the past year, homo or hetero, protected or not, one nightstands or relationship, oral anal or vaginal. I was tempted to say I had forty one-night stands with other homos where we did tons of anal sex without condoms . . .but he looked like my little cousin and I just couldn’t get the words out of my mouth.

He also offered me condoms and thanked me for coming in.

And then, I was done: a little harder than voting, more stressful than jury duty, but overall a good experience.

A Cautionary Tale

Pickup has enriched my life.

It fixed many of my shortcomings.

What it didn’t fix though, it amplified.

Valentine’s Day

Valentine’s Day is the best day to hit the club.

Single girls: a plenty.

Not single girls: all with their boyfriends/husbands/lovers/partners somewhere else.

Avoiding the club on Valentine’s Day is like telling your boss you don’t want a raise.

Get your ass out of the house.

Follow Ups

Last night was fun. It wasn’t a major party-fest, but more like a really chill time. My other friends tried dragging me to 80’s Night at Next Door, but I turtled up and was home by 10 pm. Sad huh?

I’m not exactly sure if my friend was consciously using me as social proof, but I guess it worked—even though I brought my own social proof. I’m still not convinced that a girl bringing another guy actually makes the target guy jealous. I don’t think guys’ minds work that way.

I was also getting frustrated at how the target guy was totally blah. I wanted to grab his hand and glue it to her arm. Kino man, kino.

On a sorted related note, one of her other guy friends also showed up. He sat down, told a story, and I began scratching my head with “can your DHV spikes be any MORE obvious?”** I’m sure I’m the only one who recognized them.

**DHV spikes, aka Demonstration of Higher Value Spikes, are short elements in a story showing that a guy is a person of value. One good DHV is having the Governor walk up to you, recognize you, say hi, and ask you something important. A DHV spike in a story is “so then after my meeting with the Governor . . .” (implies that the speaker is someone of importance because he had a meeting with the governor).

On a totally unrelated note, today, high school crush girl sent me back a facebook message. I thought she’d take a day, not two. Facebook is the devil. I’m not interested in her—just interested in expanding my social circle. Plus she’s good friends with my ex, who’s friends were REALLY REALLY mean to be when I saw them out a year ago. So I’m going to be a dick and steal her away. (that’s serious mad scientist speak right there).

I’m No Jealousy Tool

I don’t consider myself a player; more like a benchwarmer who only gets on the field when the spread hits 50 points. In any case though, players hate getting played, but at the same time, they love the challenge.

One of my friends invited me out. She was really persistent that I go out and even called a few times to make sure I wouldn’t flake. I thought that it was a little odd, but I just assumed she wanted me out because I’m such an awesomely fun person (and because I’m humble).

Rewind a little: a few weeks ago, she told me about a new guy she was sort of dating. We hashed out a plan and I left her to her devices.

I find out that “this dude” is going to be out with us tonight. Suddenly, I think of all the other times I called girls out to make my current “focus girl” jealous. So they way it works is that if I was into a girl and she was on the fence about me, I’d call her to hang out AND then I’d call another girl to hang out too. As stupid as it sounds and as ineffective as a thought it would be, calling other girls out is a surprisingly effective tactic to get a girl to like you.

Jealousy is the most powerful of all emotions.

I’ve lost count on how many times a girl told me “I wasn’t really into you until I saw you with that other girl.” Chick logic for you.

I’m no catalyst. I’m not the third-wheel jealousy maker; I’m the chemical reaction that goes BOOM!!

Time to call in my girls.

This is my most absurd post yet.

TV Junkie Returns

Ever have one of those days where every just begins talking to you? Elevator, parking lot, sidewalk, standing in line at McDonalds. Is everyone doing the Style Life 30 day challenge?

On a totally unrelated note, I’m back to TV junkie mode. Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles is a damn good show. Mondays on Faox.

Also, the season premiere of the nearly dead Jericho was last night. Woah, I think people are going to start paying attention from now on. Tuesdays on CBS. Well worth however many nuts those doods sent to CBS.

Facebook Shenanigans

So this girl I had a major crush on in high school adds me as a Facebook friend. Ok cool. I guess I now have license to send her messages whenever I want. I surf her page, check out her pics, find out she lives like ten thousand miles away: aight that’s nice. I file her away under my other “facebook friends” and expect that I’ll probably never talk to her.

She posts on my wall (that little comment thing); ok aight, I might make a reply post in a few weeks . . . or never.

Suddenly, I find out she’s in town. WOAH, hold up. “Self,” I say “you’d better grab your balls and get on that shit. She added you as a friend because she wants to hang out. Post on her wall at least.” So I did.

RumFire at the Sheraton Waikiki

Each new club has a 6-month shelf life until it gets too damn crowded. For the early part of 2008, that new club is RumFire located in the Sheraton Waikiki.

Inside, a large selection of rum, duh!


Outside: Fire.

And just a short walk from nice views of the beach.

www.rumfirewaikiki.com

Unequivocal Absolute Indifference Running to the Innermost Core of My Soul

This is where I want to be.

A few posts back, I discussed indifference and how it trumps confidence any day. The question now becomes how to achieve indifference and how do I know when I get there?

First, you won’t know WHEN you get there; you’ll just look back and realize you’ve arrived. If you have to ask the question “Am I there yet?” the answer is always “no.”

In terms of not drinking, I have achieved “it.”

I don’t drink. Whenever I go out, I order soda. While I do believe in the benefits of not consuming alcohol, that’s the subject of another day.

Many years ago, I used to qualify myself. I would say, “I gotta wake up early tomorrow, so I’m just gonna have a coke,” “a coke today,” or “I’m all done drinking so I’m only going to have soda.”

Eventually, I realized I shouldn’t qualify myself because it made me look pathetic. So I stopped that. I then began ordering as if I was saying “beer” instead of “soda.” In my mind though, I was crossing my fingers hoping no one would say anything. But people could sense that. Sometimes the waiter would say, “you come all the way to the club and only order ‘a coke?’” And then I’d have to qualify myself. Sometimes, other people would rip on me and I’d defend myself

After I got through that, I told myself I stopped caring if the waiter or others made a response. I told myself I would just ignore it.

Interestingly, the comments stopped.

Then, I just stopped caring if the waiter made a response.

Last night though, my friend said something “You just order your coke without even thinking you’re different.”

“I realized that I’ve arrived.” (as Kanye West would say it)

I realized, that for as long as I can remember, I’ve been ordering cokes without considering what others might say or think. I was beyond not caring, I was at the point of “it doesn’t even cross my mind that people would think of me differently.” The idea that the waiter, or people at my table, or others in the bar are going to see me as strange, never once popped into my head.


I am the perfectly still lake. Throw in a pebble and it makes no ripples. Throw in a boulder and the surface remains like glass. Nothing affects me.

I can’t remember when I got to this point, but the fact that I don’t think about it shows that I am definitely here.

So now I know what its like. The new task is to apply this to other things.

I know that if I’m telling myself “it doesn’t matter,” I haven’t achieved “it” yet. If I get blown out by a group of girls and I say “who cares?” I haven’t achieved “it” yet. If I get into an argument and have to tell myself “why does that matter?” I haven’t achieved it yet.

I need to get to the point where if something that I’m supposed to be indifferent toward happens, I just move on like it never occurred.

[Now just as a caveat, I don’t mean this to mean you can punch a cop in the face and walk away or that you should ignore your surroundings, merely that if you do something that you believe is right or best for you and it has possibility of social negativity, just do it with certainty. Don’t throw the grenade and brace for impact. Instead, throw the grenade know unequivocally--to your core--that the grenade will not explode, and it won’t.]

Obama, why not?

The dust from Super Tuesday has now settled.

After careful consideration of the five remaining candidates and their stances on the major issues, I’ve concluded that “Club Obama” has the hottest girls.


I really wanted to party at Club Richardson, but it has been shut down with and all those girls moving from New Mexico to Illinois. So it goes.

Success Mentality

I’ve lived an easy life. And I’ll be the first to admit that.

It’s not like most things in life were just handed to me—they weren’t. My life’s been easy because I’ve never really struggled at anything. I went to private school, cruised through college, did just fine in grad school, and never really busted my ass so hard I wanted to give up.

Maybe I’m just smart. Maybe I’m overly analytical. Maybe I just have a really high threshold for when a situation becomes impossible. Maybe I have a “giving up is not an option” mentality or maybe I’ve never been pushed hard enough.

I grew up in a house where my dad fixed everything. My mom would always tell me, “you are smarter than anyone you’d pay to fix it, so just figure it out and fix it yourself.”

When I saw six, I began stealing my dad’s screwdrivers to take apart things. I’ve opened up every broken electric item I’ve come across.

When I was nine, my portable dual cassette stereo started making farting noises, so I took it apart—the entire thing. I had parts laid out across a 25 square foot area, it looked like a junk yard. When I finally got to the speaker unit (at the back after removing every part on that stereo), I found that two pieces of plastic had become unglued and the loose one was rattling. So I just glued it back, put the stereo back together and it sounded like new.

When I was ten, I took apart my grandfather’s VCR, touched a capacitor and shocked myself silly. (those mini battery looking things in VCR, don’t touch them).

I guess all I’m trying to say is that my parents instilled a mentality into me that there’s nothing I can’t figure out.

Now, whenever I’m faced with a big problem, I just sit down, research the shit out of it, and figure it out. Sometimes, I think I have the answer when I don’t. Sometimes I just dive head in with the screwdriver and hope I figure it out along with way—like the time I had to call the board of water supply to turn off the water to my house. Even when things do go really bad, I don’t freak out; I just step back, analyze the situation and thank myself for the new story I can tell.

Don’t be afraid of failure, but at the same time, adopt the mind frame that assumes success and success will follow.

The Essentials

There’s a lot of stuff out there. I haven’t seen or read most of it. I’ve read a lot of crap and seen a lot of useful things. Some things pointed me in the right directions and some pushed me way off course. The following is my list of the essentials: a culled down list representing the straight arrow hammer to greatness. Read/watch them in this order:

1. Neil Strauss - The Game (Book). Reading The Game is like the moment Morpheus tells Neo the Matrix exists. It doesn’t tell us how to get to the Matrix, how to play in the Matrix, or how to win, it just tells us its there.

2. Mystery - The Venusian Arts Handbook (the ebook, not that thing they sell on Amazon). The most concise pickup book ever written. Every page is essential. So perfectly organized, Mr. Dewey would be amazed.

3. The Mystery Method - The Mystery Method (DVD). Completely disorganized, but well worth the effort. After reading The Game, I was dying with curiosity of who is this Mystery guy. Although the information and techniques are outdated, you cannot learn art without learning art history.

4. Real Social Dynamics – Foundations (DVD). Always watch the videos/DVDs instead of listening to the audio. The majority of the information is actually how the presenter acts, his body motions, his tone, and facial expressions. An audio file can’t show these things. Study a person and learn more than just the words coming out of their mouth. Anyway, this is another RSD-blow-your-mind-program that takes months to settle in your brain. All men will become a better and strong person after watching this.

5. David Deida - The Way of the Superior Man (Book). No book has ever changed my life like this one. The ideas and concepts are revolutionary. This should be required reading for all males

6. Real Social Dynamics - The Jeffy Show (DVD). I haven’t finished watching these, but so far, Jeffy’s insights, stories, and mind frame have blown my mind and reshaped it into greatness.


Other stuff that’s useful, but not required:
A. Neil Strauss - The Rules of the Game (The Stylelife Challenge)
B. Tucker Max - I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell
C. Neil Strauss - The Annihilation Method
D. Real Social Dynamics - Transformations

I’m An Asshole Republican

A recent journal has concluded that among fat people, smokers, and healthy people, the healthy people have the most expensive health care costs.

Short version is that although treatment for fat people and smokers are more expensive for a 1-year time period, the overall lifetime cost is less because fat people and smokers die sooner. In other words, health care for dead people is remarkably cheap.

I have a warped sense of humor.

Here’s the article.

Football

This season of college and NFL Football tells us two things:

(1) Anyone can win.

(2) Life comes down to a few moments.

Never give up.

Never forget that the difference between a champion and second place is often just a few seconds.

“Excuse Me?”: Hells No.

I haven’t said, “Excuse me” in a year.

Actually, I can’t even remember the last time I said it.

People sometimes give me rude looks as I walk though, but I don’t care.

Neil Strauss said, “Don’t apologize for taking up space in the universe.” I took that a little farther: I’m so important, people should move out of my way. When people don’t move, I make them get out of my way—unforgivingly.

My 2007 New Year’s resolution was “be an asshole.” The first thing I did was to stop saying, “excuse me.” I did. Now, I really didn’t do much other asshole behavior, but for me that was something.

I’ve noticed that if people see me coming and I’m 100% confident, they’ll move, they will move out of my way. BUT if I think they might move, they may or may not.

In the Jeffy show, he talks about the marital artists guys who break bricks. He said that only the guys who are 100% confident they will smash through the bricks, break the bricks. If someone is unsure, the uncertainty will permeate through their arm and hand, and they won’t break the bricks. Worse yet, they’ll just end up smashing up their own bones.

Walk up with complete certainty, be sure of yourself, don’t apologize for going their way, believe you are important, and see the people part like the Red Sea.

This even works with huge Hawaiian dudes. Most people will walk around really really big people, but I don’t. Most people will also move to the side when a big guy comes their way—I don’t. When I see a big guy coming my way, I plant, like basketball player, and hold my ground. Nearly every time, the big guy will just walk around me. Sometimes, he’ll even say “excuse me.”

I’ve noticed that if I act important, people will treat me as important. If I act unimportant, people will treat me that way. It’s practically subconscious. My new mentality is “I’m as important as the President,” so people better treat me that way.